My joke

JOKE OF THE DAY

Would You Kiss My Dog?  by: Chuck Lunsford You might think twice before allowing a dog to give you a big wet kiss if you know what I know. I also want to apologize in advance to all dog lovers. I remain an admirer of dogs, just from a distance where my face is out of reach of their over-exuberant tongues. As a child growing up in the boonies of Alabama we had a succession of dogs, some memorable and some I'd rather forget. One thing they all had in common is a trait all dogs everywhere participate in with gusto, one in which prevents me to this day from allowing a dog anywhere near my mouth. Early on in life, while still blissfully unaware, I had no qualms in allowing the current family's dog the liberty of indulging itself in a round of good-natured face-licking. After all this is for most people one of the most endearing aspect of canine ownership, letting the mutt shower them with doggie kisses for as long as the dogs owner could stand it. The pooch thinks it is showing its owner the proper display of submissive behavior and affection and believe me when I tell you that a dog will slobber all over you as long as you allow it. As I said before, my early years were spent in blissful unawareness of Fido's hygienic tendencies. Thinking about that very aspect of doggie behavior today brings back the gag reflex I experienced when I finally discovered, far too late unfortunately, how the mutt went about its daily ablutions. The dog we had at the time, if I recall, was a stray that sort of drifted in one day and decided to stay and see which way the wind blew. I saw him as companion for my many explorations back into the hills and ridges of the Appalachians. To give credit where credit is due I will say that dog was a champion walker. He would accompany me as long and as far as I asked him too. Now to the gist of this story. I remember it was a scorching hot August day. One of those kind of days where the air was thick and hard to breath. Anyway I was lounging on the front porch, enjoying a cold drink, and not paying attention to anything in particular. A movement caught my eye and I saw our dog coming down the road towards the house, returning from who knows what type of foray. About a block from the property I saw him stop suddenly and peer intently at something at his feet. Then he eased himself down onto the ground and started rolling around on his back, legs flailing the air, tongue lolling out, and appearing to be in a state of puppy bliss. Needless to say this aroused my attention. I stood up and wandered over to see what had gotten the dog all excited. Was there such a thing as dognip? Arriving on the scene my eyes were met with the disgusting spectacle of the dog rolling in the partially decomposed remains of some poor creature that wasn't able to dodge fast enough. The way the dog was carrying on you would have thought he had discovered the next greatest scent guaranteed to sweep the lady dogs off their feet. He spent a good ten minutes covering every square inch of his body with the essence of the carcass. He even belly-crawled over it a few times just to make sure no spot was missed. Once he completed this gruesome task he stood up, shook himself off, gave me a sideways glance, and headed for the porch. I stood there in shock for a second, barely able to believe what I had just witnessed. Finally gathering my wits about me I decided it would be prudent to put as much distance between me and the dog as possible. My plan was to casually walk by him (holding my breath of course), enter the front door, and escape quietly out the back door and make for the hills as fast as my legs would carry me for the remainder of the day. My reasoning was if I was several miles away I wouldn't have to put up with the smell and best of all one of the other kids would have to give the dog a bath once the rest of the family caught wind of it. Just about when I put my hand on the door handle to let myself in I noticed the dog engaged in yet another of the favorite pastimes of dogs everywhere. He had commenced licking himself over every inch of his body that he could reach. My stomach started doing flip-flops because I knew where he had been less than a minute prior, but for some unknown reason I was transfixed. I could not walk away. Some morbid part of me wanted to see just how far and how long this dog would go with this spectacle. For a good half hour I bore witness as this dog slurped himself from stem to stern, spending an inordinate amount of time in the stern area if you get my meaning. With disgust and fascination I watched the whole gruesome process, sitting down at some point to see if it would help the nausea I felt coming on. Once his ablutions were over he licked his chops as if he had just finished a choice sirloin, set his sights on me, and before I could react, pounced towards me with a twinkle in his eye and a bounce in his step. Upon later reflection I finally reasoned he wanted to thank me for "sharing" the experience by offering me some of that love and affection dogs are famous for. Instinct took over at that point and I engaged in a hasty retreat, crab-walking backwards with the dog getting ever closer, intent on showering me with attention. I stumbled slightly and he saw this as his chance. He lunged at my face with his mouth open and his tongue ready to give me the love and affection he felt I deserved as his master. Things moved pretty much in a blur at this point which is understandable considering the speed in which I moved. I vaguely remember attempting to pull my head down between my shoulders like a turtle to prevent direct contact while at the same time levitating myself to the porch railing, just barely escaping the dog and his cesspool of a mouth. Realizing he had missed his chance he looked a little contrite and hurt that I should deny him what he felt was his righteous duty. Between a fit of hyper-gagging and impaired vision brought on by the fumes emanating wafting about the porch I managed to warn him off and escaped into the house. After awhile I calmed myself down and started thinking about my previous escape plan and the possibility of putting it into action while I still could when I was overcome with a sudden sense of dread. I suddenly remembered that the previous day I had allowed this same dog, the very one who had just spent almost an hour in the most revolting display I had ever witnessed, kiss me square on the mouth. I wont go into what happened next other than to say it took me about a week, three giant tubes of toothpaste, and a couple of king-sized bottles of Listerine before I got the taste out of my mouth. Think about it folks. You might want to reconsider if PoochyPoo and his dog bad breath want to share with you where his tongue has been just before he came over to give you a smack on the lips.     To read More, you can visit my blog here

From : Free-English-Course@yahoogroups.com

 

 

English today

Welcome to the Republican Party

So, I was talking to this little girl, Catherine, the  daughter of some friends,  and she said she wanted to be President some day. Both of her parents,  liberal Democrats, were standing there with us - and I asked Catherine  - 'If you  were President what would be the first thing you would do?' Catherine  replied - 'I would give houses to all the homeless people.' 'Wow - what  a worthy goal you have there, Catherine.' I told her, 'You don't have  to wait until you're President to do that, you can come over to my house and  clean up all the dog poop in my back yard and I will pay you $5  dollars. Then we can go over to the grocery store where the homeless  guy hangs out, and you can give him the $5 dollars to use for a new  house.' Catherine (who was about 4) thought that over for a second,  while her mom looked at me seething, and Catherine replied, 'Why doesn't the homeless guy come over and clean up the dog poop and you can just pay him the  $5 dollars?' And I said, "Welcome to the Republican  Party".

Free-English-Course@yahoogroups.com

BBC Learning English

The Teacher Idioms

The Teacher bbclearningenglish.com ©BBC Learning English 2007 Page 1 of 1 Ideas for using The Teacher in class: 1. Prediction Tell students the topic of the programme e.g. 'idioms about horses'. Students work in groups to write down as many horse idioms as they can; this could be in English and / or in their own language. 2. What's the idiom? Play the video so that students have an idea of context, but pause it at the moment just before The Teacher actually says what the idiom is. Students discuss together and suggest what the idiom could be. Play the rest of the video to check. 3. What's the idiom 2? Play the video so that students have an idea of context, but pause it at the moment just before The Teacher actually says what the idiom is. Give the students a choice of several idioms - all on the same topic - Students discuss together and decide on what the correct idiom is. Play the rest of the video to check. 4. Guess the meaning Tell students the idioms before they watch the video and give them a few minutes to guess what each of them means. Then play the video so they can check if they guessed correctly. 5. Gapped script Give students the text of an episode, with the idioms blanked out. They try to guess which idioms should go in the gaps and then watch the episode to check. 6. Dialogue writing Students write a situational dialogue containing the idioms from an episode (and more idioms on the same topic if you like) and act it out for the class. 7. More idioms After watching an episode of The Teacher, students use English-English dictionaries to find more idioms on a similar theme. They work in pairs or small groups to script an episode of The Teacher to explain their chosen idioms, and act it out for the class. Have you used any of these activities? How did they go? Please let us know any ideas you have for more ways to use The Teacher in the classroom – we'd love to publish them on our site. Email us at teachingenglish@bbc.co.uk.

PhD scholarships [info]

PhD scholarships Nanophotonics for Terabit Communications (NATEC)

A new research centre focusing on nanophotonics for terabit communications is being established at the Technical University of Denmark (DTU). The centre is based on donations from a private foundation, VILLUM KANN RASNMUSSEN FONDEN. The NATEC centre will, in particular, perform research on light-matter interaction in semiconductor quantum dots and photonic crystal structures and explore the use of such nanostructured materials for realizing photonic chips operating in the terabit regime. The centre is a strongly focused effort involving nanofabrication, experimental characterisation based on nanoscopy and ultrafast lasers, fundamental theory including topology optimization, and systems experiments and will provide ample opportunities for cross-fertilization between these areas. The NATEC Centre is headed by Professor Jesper Mørk (jm@com.dtu.dk) from Department of Photonics Engineering, DTU, and involves the collaboration with 4 other institutes at DTU: Department of Micro- and Nanotechnology, Department of Mechanical Engineering, Center for Electron Nanoscopy and Danchip. At the moment we have openings within the following areas of research: Growth and characterisation of semiconductor quantum dots and fabrication of photonic crystal based devices (Kresten Yvind; ky@com.dtu.dk). Characterisation of pulse propagation in photonic crystal structures and ultrafast dynamics in quantum dots (Mike van der Poel; mvp@com.dtu.dk). Theory and modelling of light-matter interaction in photonic crystal structures with quantum dots (Niels Asger Mortensen; nam@mic.dtu.dk). Topology optimization of nanophotonic structures incorporating effects of nonlinearities and fabrication uncertainties (Ole Sigmund; sigmund@mek.dtu.dk). Experimental and theoretical investigations of terabit systems emphasizing noise limitations and information capacity (Palle Jeppesen; pj@com.dtu.dk). We are looking for candidates with a strong track record and with a good experimental, theoretical and/or computational background in photonics, electromagnetics or materials engineering and physics. The annual salary of PhD students starts at approximately 277,000 DKK (36,900 EUR) + pension. For further information please contact Jesper Mørk or the persons mentioned above, or see the full job announcement at the homepage of DTU. Please send your application as a single pdf file, including CV, list of publications, certificates of exams and grades, as well as a list of references to: Director Anders Bjarklev Department of Photonics Engineering Ørsteds Plads, Building 343 Technical University of Denmark DK-2800 Kgs. Lyngby Denmark Email: natecapplications@fotonik.dtu.dk.

Deadline for application: July 14, 2008 at 12.00 noon. http://www.jobs.ac.uk/jobs/MC696/PhD_scholarships

 

[English]

5 Practical Reasons Why You Should Definitely

Intellectuals are often recognized by their ability to conduct fluent conversations in several languages, usually English, French and German. Being fluent in a foreign language is a pre-requirement for many academic programs and is often a mark of intelligence and capability. The majority of the non English world studies English as a default second language (as I have). That's a step in the right direction. But I insist we should not stop there. I've decided to study French as an additional foreign language and urge my dear readers to do the same. The most common languages on earth are Mandarin Chinese (885 million speakers), Spanish (332 million), English (322 million), Bengali (189 million) and Hindi (182 million). The UN's 5 official languages are: Chinese, English, French, Russian and Arabic. I believe that one of the basic steps to understanding the world we live in is to accept cultural and ethnical diversity. Language is one of the very basic building blocks of the latter. There are many benefits to being fluent in more languages. Some are more obvious than others. Here are 5 key benefits in my opinion: #1 Opening an entirely new potential "market" for yourself Languages are doorways to worlds and markets. In a recent interview with investment guru Jim Rogers he told about his daughter's Chinese nanny and the Chinese lessons she's taking at a very early age to prepare her for the future. Any foreign language opens a doorway to a foreign economy and market, each with vast opportunities of its own. Needless to say, the expanding globalization in the world's economy has created a high demand for language skills and cultural diversity. #2 Creating a competitive edge A foreign language is one of the best ways of creating a competitive edge relatively quickly. If you have the time you can become quite fluent in a foreign language in a matter of months. If you have only several hours a week it could take a year up to a year and a half but its well worth the investment. Consider how your resume would look like if you were fluent in another language. Consider how you would be able to differentiate yourself from your fellow colleagues and offer a different added value to potential employers. #3 Branding yourself differently Marketing is almost everything these days. Branding yourself is required to succeed in any field of work. Fluency in a foreign language tends to stand out quickly enough and is guaranteed not to be forgotten. Naturally the more exotic the language the bigger the impact but all foreign languages will achieve this effect. #4 Increasing your networking opportunities From my own experience the same people who've decided to invest their free time in learning a foreign language are the same people you'd like to network with. Nearly all professions benefit from synergies created by speaking another language. #5 Expanding your horizons We all live on the same planet. Another language will introduce new worlds and cultures to you. Cultural and ethnical diversity are greatly appreciated and contribute to our evolution as human beings. Understanding the world we live in is invaluable to every metric for success everywhere.

from: http://www.thepersonalfinancier.com/search/label/Leadership

 

Let's Learn about Concord in English

Concord

Concord adalah persesuaian antara subyek dalam suatu kalimat dengan kata kerjanya (subject-verb agreement) dalam suatu kalimat. Misalnya, tenses suatu kalimat adalah present perfect. Bila subyeknya he/she/it, maka auxiliary yang dipakai adalah has. Bila subyeknya we/you/they, maka auxiliary yang dipakai adalah have.  1.     Subyek dengan awalan every, each of, either/either of…, neither/neither of … dianggap tunggal. Contoh        Every man and woman wants to have true love.        Each of the students does the assignment individually.        Either of us has to go there.        Neither of them deserves to get punishment. 2.     Subyek singular tetap diikuti dengan verb/auxiliary singular apabila subyek tersebut diikuti oleh ungkapan yang bermakna jamak semisal, along with, together with, accompanied by, etc. Contoh        The teacher along with the students does an experiment in the lab.        The coach together with all football players is entering the stadium. 3.     Subyek anybody, anyone, anything. someone, somebody, something, no one, nobody, dan nothing diikuti oleh verb singular. Contoh        Something smells bad in the basket.        Nobody wants to be lonely. 4.     Nama-nama cabang ilmu dianggap singular Contoh        Mathematics is a difficult subject.        Linguistics is quite interesting. 5.     Subyek uncountable noun dianggap singular Contoh        Sugar makes tea sweet.        The information is reported by the newsreader. 6.     Subyek yang menggunakan either…or….., neither…..nor…… Verb yang digunakan tergantung pada bentuk subyek setelah or atau nor. Begitupula bila either atau neither berdiri sendiri. Contoh        Either Indra or his brother spends holiday in Bali.        Neither my mother nor my father gives me some extra money.        Either the teacher or the students get hurt in the accident.        Neither Mrs. Irman nor her children participate in ketua RT election.        Fruit or vegetables are good for our health. 7.     Subyek yang menggunakan A number diikuti oleh verb jamak, sedangkan The number diikuti oleh verb tunggal. Contoh        A number of labors go to the street to demonstrate on the Labor day.        The number of unemployment is getting higher recently. 8.     Subyek yang menyatakan jumlah, jarak, volume, berat, uang, prosentase, dan waktu dianggap tunggal. Contoh        60 minutes is one hour.        Ten days is the time we need for the experiment. 9.     Subyek gerund dianggap tunggal Contoh        Hiking is my hobby.        Consuming vitamin keeps your body healthy. 10.  Subyek yang berupa frase panjang, yang menentukan jenis verb adalah kata sebelum preposisi. Contoh        The fast-growing development of Asian country is surprising.        Different interpretations on same events by various newspapers make the readers confused.     Exercises Choose the correct answer! 1.     Every citizen of Indonesia (has/have) the right to vote in the general election. 2.     A number of fast-food restaurants (has/have) become popular because many working people (want/wants) to eat quickly and cheaply. 3.     Neither Asti nor her friends (is/are) going to go to the theater. 4.     The number of unemployment (are/is) decreasing. 5.     Each of participants (take/takes) the opportunity to speak their mind. 6.     Either of the policemen (admit/admits) the mistake. 7.     The New York Times (is/are) a daily newspaper. 8.     Nothing (has/have) been taken as a serious step to solve the environmental problem.

FROM : Melina Kurniawan (Free-English-Course@yahoogroups.com)

 
 

 

 
 

Scholarships

London South Bank University

London South Bank University MPhil-PhD Scholarships Business Faculty of Business, Computing & Information Management Fully-funded: UK/EU/Overseas applicants We seek applications for a research scholarship: * MPhil-PhD in a suitable aspect of Business The scholarships are for award to outstanding UK/EU/Overseas applicants and are intended to commence in the 2008/2009 academic year. The scholarships have an annual bursary of £15,000 for the 2008/2009 academic year, and fee-settlement of the relevant annual tuition fee. They are to be offered only to new full-time research students. In the first instance they are offered for one year only, but subject to satisfactory annual progress, are renewable for each of a further two academic years. You will need a distinctive and related Master's degree, supported by relevant practical experience and a high standard of both spoken and written English. Applications are sought from all eligible applicants, in particular, those who obtained their Master's degree from the Faculty of Business, Computing & Information Management of London South Bank University. The faculty's business-related Research Institute and Centres welcome suitable applicants for doctoral level research training. Applications are invited from scholars wishing to undertake MPhil-PhD research within one or more of the business-related areas stated below: 1. Accounting, Finance & Governance (Centre for Research in Accounting, Finance & Governance) 2. International Business (Centre for International Business) 3. International Marketing (Ehrenberg Centre for Research in Marketing) 4. Not-for-Profit and/or Third Sector (Centre for Government & Charity Management) 5. Social and Financial Systems (Centre for Social & Financial Systems Research) 6. Strategy, Management, Leadership and Innovation (Institute for Strategic Leadership & Service Improvement) To apply please send a recent CV, the names and contact details of two referees and a brief (circa 700 words) description of the research area that is of interest. Please quote ref: BCIM 02. In addition, you must also complete the standard form for admission to a research degree at London South Bank University available at: http://www.lsbu.ac.uk/rbdo/forms/Admission-Application-RES1.doc and sent it to: Dr Kenneth D'Silva, Director of Postgraduate Research Degrees Programme, Faculty of Business, Computing & Information Management, London South Bank University, 103 Borough Road, London SE1 0AA, England. Informal enquiries about these scholarships may be made to Dr D'Silva on dsilvake@lsbu.ac.uk or fax + 44 (20) 7815 7891. In all cases, fully completed applications must be received no later than 7 July, 2008.

 

Today Story

[English] Story Zone

MONKEY IN THE PLANE

Once in Brazil a plane crashed, only a monkey who was traveling in the plane was left alive.     Fortunately the monkey was intelligent enough to understand our language and reply in actions. The officials went to see the monkey in the hospital and had a talk with the monkey. Officer: 'When the plane took off what were the travelers doing?' Monkey: 'Tying their belts'   Officer: 'What were the air hostesses doing?' Monkey: 'Saying Hello! Good morning!'   Officer: 'What were the pilots doing?' Monkey: 'Checking the system'   Officer: 'What were you doing?' Monkey: 'Looking for my people' Officer: 'After 10' minutes what were the travelers doing?' Monkey: 'Having beverages and snacks'   Officer: 'What were the air hostesses doing?' Monkey: 'Serving the travelers'   Officer: 'What were the Pilots doing?' Monkey: 'Handling the steering'   Officer: 'What were you doing?' Monkey: 'Eating & throwing' Officer: 'After 30 minutes what were the travelers doing?' Monkey: 'Some were sleeping and some were reading'   Officer: 'What were the air hostesses doing?' Monkey: 'Make up'   Officer: 'What were the pilots doing?' Monkey: 'Handling the steering'   Officer: 'What were you doing?' Monkey: 'Nothing' Officer: 'Just before plane crash what were the travelers doing?' Monkey: 'All were sleeping'   Officer: 'What were the pilots doing?' Monkey: 'Handling the air hostess'   Officer: What were you doing? Monkey: Handling the steering!!!! ! No more Questions!!! !!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!

By: Free-English-Course@yahoogroups.com

Scholarships Info

Australian Development

Australian Development Scholarships (ADS) provide opportunities for Indonesians to study in Australia at POSTGRADUATE level. Three hundred scholarships are expected to be awarded in 2009 for commencement in 2009/2010. Candidates must undertake study in one of the four areas of development priority (see page ii). ADS are offered in three categories: 'Public' sector, 'Open' and 'Targeted'. Targeted applicants are employees of agencies associated with AusAID activities including government organisations, BUMNs, NGOs, CSOs and key state and private educational institutions which service the training needs of these organisations.Their nomination must be facilitated through the Project Leader or the relevant representative of an AusAID activity. GENERAL INFORMATION NOTES Public sector applicants are employees from Government departments, state universities and state-owned enterprises – this includes non-PNS employees. Their applications must be approved by the training or foreign cooperation bureaus (BKLN) of their local or central agencies before being submitted. No prior government approval is required for those in the Open category. Public servants cannot apply in the Open category. Scholarships are for full-time study for a Masters or Doctorate degree from Australian tertiary institutions. The scholarship provides up to nine months full-time language and academic preparation in Indonesia. Students must achieve satisfactory results in this training to be able to continue their scholarships. Applications from women and candidates in provinces within the geographic focus of AusAID's Country Strategy (see page ii) are encouraged. The closing date is 5 September 2008. Applications should be submitted as early as possible. ELIGIBILITY IN GENERAL, CANDIDATES MUST:          be an Indonesian citizen and not have permanent residence in Australia or New Zealand;          not be married or engaged to a person who is eligible to hold Australian or New Zealand citizenship or permanent residence;          satisfy Australian Government requirements for international student entry to Australia (health, character etc);          not hold a scholarship that would give similar benefits;          not have held an Australian Government Scholarship in the 12 months preceding the application;          be applying to commence a new course of study and not be seeking support through ADS for a course already commenced in          Australia;          be able to take up the scholarship in the year for which it is offered; and          satisfy the admission requirements of the Australian tertiary institution in which the course is to be undertaken. SPECIFICALLY, CANDIDATES MUST: be applying for courses that fall within the areas of development priority (see next page); at the time of application, be no more than 42 years of age. have a Grade Point Average (GPA) of at least 2.9 (on a scale of maximum 4.0) and an English language proficiency of at least 5.0 in IELTS (or 500 in Institutional TOEFL or 170 in International TOEFL). The IELTS or TOEFL result must be current (a test result obtained in 2007 or 2008 will be considered current); already hold an undergraduate degree, if applying for a Masters; already have a Masters, if applying for a Doctorate; apply for a degree at a level higher than their current highest qualification; if applying for a Doctorate, applicants will be restricted to staff of universities, higher education institutions, research institutes, key policy makers and targeted candidates in other agencies associated with AusAID activities; answer all relevant questions on the application form; and be willing and available to undertake full-time (Monday – Friday, 08.00 am – 16.00 pm) English for Academic Purposes (EAP) training in Indonesia prior to studying in Australia, if offered a scholarship; it is highly desirable for Doctorate applicants to have a letter of support from an Australian university for their proposed field of study. Visit www.adsjakarta.or.id to download the 2009 Application Form

From : Free-English-Course@yahoogroups.com

[English] A Bad Mistake

A Bad Mistake

1st woman: Hi! My name is Wanda. 2nd woman: Hi! I'm Sylvia. How'd you die? 1st woman: I froze to death. 2nd woman: How horrible! 1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you? 2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV. 1st woman: So, what happened? 2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking.I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died. 1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer---we'd both still be alive.

From : Free-English-Course@yahoogroups.com

 

__._,_.___

English Space

WORDS OF WISDOM Kata-kata bijak

"Focused will is incredible. If you have a dream and you don't give up no matter what obstacles come up, then life's problems will fall away and you will get what you want. It happens. It works." ~~Yanni     "Sesuatu yang difokuskan akan menakjubkan. Jika anda mempunyai sebuah mimpi dan anda tidak menyerah ketika rintangan datang, maka problem kehidupan yang anda miliki akan turun dan anda kan mendapatkan apa yang anda inginkan. (maka sesungguhnya) Hal itu terjadi. Hal itu bekerja."  ~Yanni

"Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are." ~~ Bernice Johnson Reagon     "Rintangan hidup tidak diperuntukkan untuk melumpuhkan anda, rintangan hidup diperuntukkan untuk membantu anda menemukan siapa anda sebenarnya". ~ Bernice J.R.

"To be successful you must accept all challenges that come your way. You can't just accept the ones you like." ~~ Mike Gafka     "Untuk menjadi sukses, anda harus menerima semua rintangan yang datang kepada anda. Anda tidak dapat hanya menerima yang anda sukai".  ~ Mike Gafka

"Little minds are tamed and subdued by misfortune; but great minds rise above it." ~~ Washington Irving     "Pemikiran yang kecil (sedikit) dijinakkan dan ditundukkan dengan kemalangan, tetapi pemikiran besar jauh lebih tinggi  dari hal itu". ~ Washington Irving

"The obstacles you face are... mental barriers which can be broken by adopting a more positive approach."  ~~ Clarence Blasier     "Rintangan yang anda hadapi adalah ... kendala mental yang akan di rusak dengan mengadopsi pendekatan yang lebih posistif". ~Clarence Blasier

From : Free-English-Course@yahoogroups.com

 
 

 
 

 
 

Info Job

VACANCY

AXA is the largest insurance insurance company in the world and has offices in more than 60 countries throughout Europe, North America, the Asia Pacific, Africa and the Middle East. With a sales force of more than 5000 agents and financial advisors, AXA Indonesia manages assets worth more than 6 trillion Rupiah and has more than 320.000 clients.  In AXA our ambition is to become the preferred company and the largest insurance company in Indonesia. For that ambition we need excellent leaders. To develop those leaders we've created the AXA Future Leaders Program in which we'll develop management trainees to become our leaders of tomorrow. For this program we invite highly talented university graduates to apply  Management Trainees for AXA Future Leaders Program Requirements: •       University graduates (Bachelor min. GPA 3.0/Master min. GPA 3.3) in accounting, finance, marketing, medical science, actuarial studies, mathematics, engineering, management, psychology or computer science •       Overseas graduates with no more than 2 years work experience •       History of leadership roles in school or the community •       Excellent analytical skills, full of initiative and eager to learn new things •       Excellent communications and persuasion skills •       Excellent English skills both oral and written  Please submit your CV and application letter (in English) including a one paragraph motivation of why you want to work for AXA, at the latest by June 25, 2008 to: hrd@axa-services.co.id All applications will be treated with confidentially.     If you want to know more about AXA, please visit www.axa.co.id

From : Free-English-Course@yahoogroups.com

[English] Quick Tips to Improve Self Confidence

Quick Tips to Improve Self Confidence

Here are some quick tips to improve your Self Confidence.  If we are committed to have a healthy self confidence there are many things you can do every day to boost your self confidence, each small steps that will help you to reach your goal. The good news is that self-esteem is not fixed and can be improved, try some of the steps below to boost your confidence and self-esteem.     1) Identify your successes. Everyone is good at something, so discover the things at which you excel, then focus on your talents. Give yourself permission to take pride in them. Give yourself credit for your successes. Inferiority is a state of mind in which you've declared yourself a victim. Do not allow yourself to be victimized.     2) Look in the mirror and smile. Studies surrounding what's called the "facial feedback theory" suggest that the expressions on your face can actually encourage your brain to register certain emotions. So by looking in the mirror and smiling every day, you might feel happier with yourself and more confident in the long run.     3) Exercise and eat healthy. Exercise raises adrenaline and makes one feel happier and healthier. It is certainly an easy and effective way to boost your self-confidence. 4) Turn feelings of envy or jealousy into a desire to achieve. Stop wanting what others have just because they have it; seek things simply because you want them, whether anybody else has them or not. 5) When you're feeling superbly insecure, write down a list of things that are good about you. Then read the list back. You'd be surprised at what you can come up with. 6) Don't be afraid to push yourself a bit - a little bit of pressure can actually show just how good you are! 7) You can try taking a martial arts or fitness class/course (or both). This will help build confidence and strength. 8) Invest in some new clothing and donate some of your old clothing to send a message to yourself that you both look sharp and feel sharp. 9) Try to make yourself talk positively at all times. When you hear yourself saying you can't do something, stop and say you can. Unless you try, you will never know whether you are able to or not. 10) Don't get wrapped up in your mistakes and dwell on bad points; they can contrast your good points or even give you something to improve. There's no feeling like being good at something you were really bad at. 11) Don't confuse what you have with who you are. People degrade their self worth when comparing possessions. 12) Surround yourself with nurturing friends, not overly critical individuals who make you feel inadequate or insecure. This could do great harm and damage to your self confidence.

From : Free-English-Course@yahoogroups.com

[INFO] Postdoc position bioinformatics for toxicometabolomics NTC

SCIENTIST BIOINFORMATICS FOR TOXICOMETABOLOMICS F/M

At RIKILT - Institute of Food Safety, research cluster Toxicology & Effect Monitoring.   job opening number: RIK.801.2008-01

Job description You will be working at RIKILT in the field of bioinformatics for metabolomics within the Netherlands Toxicogenomics Centre (www.toxicogenomics.nl). The most important tasks will be the establishment of a pipeline and database for the available metabolomics data from LC-MS, GC(GC)MS and NMR. You will implement preprocessing strategies (p.e. www.metalign.nl) , quality control, data mining and statistics. You will interact with NTC participants in metabolome data analysis of toxicological experiments. You will also make interactions possible with text-mining and pathway programs. A tight collaboration will be set up with the chair of Bioinformatics at WUR (Prof. dr. Jack Leunissen) (www.bioinformatics.nl) as well as the other bioinformatics participants within NTC. Within the Cluster Toxicology & Effect monitoring at RIKILT you will be co-responsible for the acquisition, implementation and management of food safety projects in this field.   What we ask A Ph.D. with solid experience in the area of informatics or bioinformatics, programming and databasing, preferably with experience in analytical chemistry and biochemistry. You are a real team player, innovator and stimulator. You are driven, result-oriented and you have excellent communication and writing skills.   What we offer A stimulating position in pleasant and high-level work surroundings. We offer a fulltime position for three years with possibilities for a two-year extension. Salary ranging is from 2812–4371 Euro per month depending upon experience.   Information For further information on this position please contact Dr. Arjen Lommen (arjen.lommen@wur.nl), tel.: +31-317-480264 and/or Dr. Ad Peijnenburg (ad.peijnenburg@wur.nl), tel.: +31-317-480284. For Further information: http://www.rikilt.wur.nl/UK/   Application Please submit your application letter with CV before the 2nd of July 2008 by e-mail to: vacatures.rikilt@wur.nl

 

 

 

 

 

 

INDONESIAN SPACE

BUMI DEMAM TINGGI!

Apa Anda merasakannya? Malas berlama-lama di bawah sinar matahari? Tidak juga dengan pertolongan topi atau payung? Tidak cukup dengan kipas? Kebutuhan pendingin ruangan kian tinggi? Pagi terasa seperti siang yang menusuk? Siang membuat dehidrasi? Musim kemarau lebih panjang? Demam berdarah dan malaria muncul dimana-mana? Hujan deras tiba-tiba datang dan mengundang banjir?   Jawabannya, ya! "Dekade 1990-an dan 2000-an adalah 10 tahun terpanas!" World Meteorological Organization.   Kok bisa? Permukaan bumi dilapisi dengan Gas Rumah Kaca (GRK). Ketika masuk atmosfer Bumi, panas matahari harus melewati panel ini. Kemudian diserap oleh tanah, air, dan ekosistem lain. Makanya, Bumi terasa hangat. Kalau tidak ada GRK, Bumi akan dingin dan beku. Proses ini disebut Efek Rumah Kaca. Secara alami GRK penting. TAPI, GRK di atmosfer bertambah kian hari kian cepat. Bahkan terlalu cepat.     Alhasil, Bumi makin panas!   AKIBATNYA? Gletser di Kutub Utara dan Selatan mencair! 10 – 20% gletser di pegunungan Alpen hilang dalam 20 tahun mendatang. Gletser seluas 33.000 km2 di pegunungan Himalaya mencair Permukaan air laut naik 9 – 96 cm. Garis pantai bergeser dan penduduk pesisir pantai terancam mengungsi! Termasuk Indonesia. Sumber kebutuhan air tawar sepertiga penduduk dunia kering pada tahun 2100. Suhu air laut yang panas membuat terumbu karang menjadi putih dan mati, termasuk berbagai jenis ikan karang yang jadi sumber makanan manusia juga. Jumlah kelahiran penyu betina lebih banyak dibandingkan penyu jantan akibat suhu pengeraman yang lebih tinggi. 80% spesies tanaman dan binatang akan punah dalam 1 abad mendatang. Kekeringan dan kebakaran hutan di hutan tropis Indonesia kian tinggi. Bagaimana dengan orang utan dan habitatnya? Atau, kita, manusia? Beberapa jenis nyamuk pembawa penyakit, seperti demam berdarah dan malaria, menyebar keluar dari daerah tropis. Musim kemarau panjang dan musim hujan yang singkat à gagal panen, krisis pangan. Intensitas hujan yang hebat hingga terjadi badai besar, hujan keras, dan banjir. Kira-kira 150,000 jiwa tewas setiap tahunnya akibat pemanasan global. Tahun 2003, gelombang udara panas di Eropa menelan 25.482 jiwa. Perkiraan kerugian dari perubahan iklim mencapai USD 11 milyar atau sekitar Rp 110 trilyun per tahun!   KITA, PENYEBABNYA! Kita seringkali menggunakan bahan bakar fosil (batu bara, gas alam, minyak bumi) dalam beraktivitas. Pertumbuhan penduduk, perkembangan industri, dan teknologi makin menambah parah jumlah emisi GRK yang dilepas ke udara.   Darimana datangnya GRK? 37% total emisi CO2 datang dari sektor listrik à polutan terbesar: 23 trilyun ton emisi CO2 per tahun atau lebih dari 700 ton per detik dari pembangkit listrik berbahan bakar fosil. Pembuangan transportasi. Kendaraan yang mengonsumsi 7,8 liter bahan bakar per 100 km dan menempuh jarak 16 ribu km, setiap tahunnya mengeluarkan emisi 3 ton CO2 ke udara! Penggundulan atau pembakaran hutan.   Tahukah Anda? Saat kita menonton TV, menyalakan AC, menyalakan lampu, menggunakan pengering rambut, bermain video game, menggunakan microwave, mencuci/mengeringkan pakaian dengan mesin cuci, menyetrika baju, dan semua aktivitas yang menggunakan listrik berarti kita sudah membuat Bumi bertambah panas.   Apa yang bisa SAYA lakukan? Smat Saving: Memilih teknologi terbaru yang membutuhkan energi sedikit namun tetap nyaman. Atau, ganti lampu hemat listrik. Menggunakan energi dengan bijaksana akan mengurangi kebocoran energi yang tidak perlu. Lebih sedikit gunakan kendaraan dalam perjalanan singkat atau dekat. Jalan kaki, kayuh sepeda, naik mobil beramai-ramai, dan kendaraan umum, selain akan menghemat pengeluaran transport Anda, tentu saja mengurangi karbondioksida. Sekaligus olah raga, kan? Periksa ban kendaraan Anda. Menjaga "kesehatan" ban Anda secara teratur mengurangi 10 kg karbondioksida di atmosfer. Daur ulang sering-sering. Anda bisa menghemat 1200 kg karbondioksida per tahun HANYA dengan mendaur ulang setengah sampah kertas Anda sehari. Butuh air hangat untuk mandi, air panas untuk minum kopi dan teh, atau mencuci pakaian? Gunakan secukupnya dan Anda mengurangi 420 kg karbondioksida per tahun. Banyak, kan? Hindari membeli produk dengan bungkus berlapis-lapis. Tahukah Anda, setiap kali Anda mengurangi 10% sampah saja, Anda sudah mengurangi 600 kg karbondioksida. Tanam pohon, tentu saja. Bayangkan, satu pohon saja bisa menghisap 1 ton karbondioksida sepanjang hidupnya. Matikan alat elektronik! TV, DVD, VCD, MP3, stereo, komputer, games, ketika Anda tidak sedang menggunakannya. Anda menghemat beribu-ribu kg karbondioksida per tahun. Tak perlu dipindahkan ke posisi stand-by atau memasang timer karena listrik masih tetap mengalir. Jadi, padam sama sekali.

WWF-Indonesia Kantor Taman A9 Unit A-1 Kawasan Mega Kuningan Jakarta 12950 Tel: +62 21 5761070 (ext.104) Fax: +62 21 5761080 Email: pandashop@wwf.or.id

 

 
 

 
 

 
 

 
 

 
 

 
 

Tips Zone

How to succeed

PLAN while others are playing. ******* STUDY while others are sleeping. ******* DECIDE while others are delaying. ******* PREPARE while others are daydreaming. ******* BEGIN while others are procrastinating. ******* WORK while others are wishing. ******* SAVE while others are wasting. ******* LISTEN while others are talking. ******* SMILE while others are frowning. ******* COMMEND while others are criticizing. ******* PERSIST while others are quitting. *******

By: Free-English-Course@yahoogroups.com

Flash

WORDS OF WISDOM IN THE FORM OF QUOTES

"Focused will is incredible. If you have a dream and you don't give up no matter what obstacles come up, then life's problems will fall away and you will get what you want. It happens. It works." ~~ Yanni   *******   "Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are." ~~ Bernice Johnson Reagon   *******   "To be successful you must accept all challenges that come your way. You can't just accept the ones you like." ~~ Mike Gafka ******* "Little minds are tamed and subdued by misfortune; but great minds rise above it." ~~ Washington Irving *******   "The obstacles you face are... mental barriers which can be broken by adopting a more positive approach."  ~~ Clarence Blasier

By: Free-English-Course@yahoogroups.com

 
 

 

 
 

SNOP Flash

5 Pairs of Words Often Confused

"Principal" and "principle." "Principal" means head or chief (like of a company or school), while "principle" is a basic truth or tenet. "Complement" and "compliment." Unless you're giving away free stuff or telling someone how nice she looks today, you probably mean the first one, which is defined as "to complete." "Fewer" and "less." The supermarket checkouts should say "10 items or fewer" because "fewer" means a smaller number of units. "Less," on the other hand, means a smaller quantity. In other words, if you can't count it, use "less." "Capitol" and "capital." "Capitol" refers to that building in Washington where the legislature meets, while "capital" relates to money or is an uppercase letter. "Bi-monthly" and "semi-monthly." WHY magazine is published bi-monthly, or every two months. Semi-monthly means twice a month.

BY : Free-English-Course@yahoogroups.com

Info

Aegis Alexander Graham Bell Scholarship

Aegis Alexander Graham Bell Scholarship for Masters Program in Telecom Management for August 2008-09 at Aegis School of Business, Mumbai, India. "Aegis Alexander Graham Bell Scholarship" for Masters Program in Telecom Management: A generous range of scholarships are available to students of all nationalities to support full-time study of Masters Program in Telecom Management (MPTMP), commonly known as MBA in Telecom, at Aegis School of Business. View the details here All successful candidates are automatically considered for scholarship support and are notified as part of the admissions process. Prospective students are encouraged to apply early to ensure they are considered for all scholarship opportunities. Please note that scholarships vary in value and have different criteria on which they are awarded. There are a number of scholarships up to $8,750, covering part or full tuition fee, are available for highly motivated self-funded outstanding female candidates from any part of the world. Aegis, a live consulting based business school, was started with the support of Bharti Telecom (Airtel), India's top Telecom Company, for developing the next generation of leaders. Aegis School of Business is the most international business school in India, in term of student and faculty diversity. School has over 70 % International candidates, which is the highest among any Indian Business Schools. The international diversity at Aegis prepares participants for a global work place. Aegis offers one-year full time programs: MBA/ PGP, MBA IT, MS in Computer Engineering/ MPIS, Masters in Telecommunication Management program, Post Graduate Program in Communication. Selection for these scholarships will focus on the insights provided by your experience, technical competency, academic excellence and how these, together with your interpersonal skills, can be used to enhance learning and group work at Aegis. Eligibility: This Scholarship is available for candidates admitted in full-time programs at Aegis and has a confirm offer letter. Candidate should have Bachelors Degree/ Diploma in science or Technology. You can refer the details of Eligibility criteria for admissions at www.aegisedu.org/Admission%20Requirements.htm Scholarship Amount: Scholarships up to $8,750 covering the full or partial tuition fee are available for highly motivated, self-funded individuals. Selection Process: * Applications evaluation and short listing * Interview of Short-listed candidates ( option for telephonic interviewavailable) * Please note that scholarships vary in value and have different criteria on which they are awarded. Eligibility: To be eligible for Scholarship you need final admission offer letter from Aegis. Important Dates: Application on ongoing basis 2nd round application deadline 25 June 2008 3rd round application deadline 10 July 2008

Info selengkapnya http://intscholarships.com/s/india-aegis-alexander-graham-bell-scholarship-masters-program -- GBU Hardhono http://hardhono.blogspot.com

 

[Info] Asian Science Camp 2008

Asian Science Camp 2008 August 3-9, 2008, Inna Grand Bali Beach Bali, Sanur-Bali, Indonesia

· A rare first-hand opportunity for 500 Asian students / teachers to share thought with and learn from Nobel Laureates (in Physics, Chemistry, Biology,Medicine) and other world-class scientists. · International annual event to promote friendship and cooperation among best Asian young students. · Developing network among teachers/lecturers from different Asian countries. · Featuring: Nobel Laureates & World-Class Scientists · Prof. Yuan Tseh Lee Ph. D. (1986 Nobel Laureate in Chemistry, Chinese Taipei) · Prof. Richard Robert Ernst Ph. D. (1991 Nobel Laureate in Chemistry, Switzerland) · Prof. Douglas D. Osheroff Ph. D. (1996 Nobel Laureate in Physics, USA) · Prof. Chintamani Nagesa Ramachandra Rao F.R.S. (2000 Hughes Medal by Royal Society, CSIR Centre of Excellence in Chemistry, India) · Prof. Masatoshi Koshiba Ph. D. (2002 Nobel Laureate in Physics, Japan) · Prof. David Gross Ph. D. (2004 Nobel Laureate in Physics, USA) · Prof. Myriam P. Sarachik Ph. D. (2005 L¢Oreal/UNESCO Woman in Science Laureate, Physics Department, City College of CUNY, USA) · Phyllis Osheroff Ph. D. (Stanford University, USA) Overseas Indonesian Scientists · Prof. Nelson Tansu, Ph.D. (Lehigh University, USA) · Lim Yow Pin MD, Ph.D. (Brown Medical School, USA) · Dr.rer.nat. Johny Setiawan (Max Planck Institute for Astronomy, Germany) · Rizal Fajar Hariadi B.S., Ph.D. cand. (California Institute of Technology, USA) Indonesian speakers/ researchers · Dr. Laksana Tri Handoko (Indonesian Institute of Sciences /LIPI) · Dr. Teguh Triono (Indonesian Institute of Sciences /LIPI) · Dr. Adi Santoso (Indonesian Institute of Sciences /LIPI) · Dr. rer.nat. Heri Haerudin (Indonesian Institute of Sciences /LIPI)   Participant requirements:   · High School/University student majoring in Physics/Chemistry/Biology/ Medicine, aged 16-22 years · Has great passion in Science · Good command of oral and written English · Will be able to fully attend the 2008 ASC, with leave permission from school/university · Submit two recommendation letters by principal and science teacher regarding scientific achievements · Pass the selection criteria

For further Information, registration and order of video documentation, please contact: Sylvie +62 21 - 551 2584; +62 21 - 716 80499; 081 611 08204; email: sylvie@suryainstitute.org or visit www.suryainstitute.org/asc2008